I have come to a basic truth for me. There is a very good chance that I will independently choose one car in my life. And that car is gone. I will have a say in the rest of the cars, but it is unlikely I will do the majority of the choosing. I don't have the knowledge, or really even desire to do so. Jet LOVES cars, he maintains mine. So he has a significant say. Obsidian looks to be taking in his footsteps, so even if Jet no longer can help make the car decision, I'm guessing Obsidian will be involved.
My first car, my dad choose. It was okay. I did not dislike it, but I was never in love either. I was glad when I got rid of it. I sold it to my dad. Then I had to get rid of it again after my dad passed away. It was a huge pile of problems at that point, so it was a little sad to get rid of my first car and my dad's last car, but I had no great love of the White Lady. She was a car. A very quirky car.
But from the time I was in college, I dreamed of getting my make and model car. Which is sort of a crazy statement to make, as it is a very practical no frills car. Not many people dream and want something as basic is it as their ideal dream car. But that is my personality. I had Jet look over my choice, and he found nothing wrong with it. Since then, my mother, then my MIL, then my SIL (Jet's sister, although hers is the SUV), my sister, then Jet, then my brother, and now my youngest brother, have all got the same car (some little variances, some automatic, some manuals, but basically the same car). None of them loved their cars as I did, but they liked the practicality of each of theirs.
Jet literally proposed to me as I was signing the papers to finalize the sale of the car (it was odd, having to sign my maiden name repeatedly this week, as the car was still titled that way). The next day, we drove across Canada to go to my cousin's wedding. The craziness that was the first 18 months of my marriage, that car got me, and everyone it needed to, where it needed to go. It went between 3 cities that were anywhere from 240 to 680 miles apart, repeatedly. There was one month I drove it 1300 miles a week. For a month. And there was a different 2 month span I was driving it a minimum of 600 miles a week. I listened to a lot of audio books and NPR in those days. It got me, Jet, my MIL, and my SIL to my MIL's only sibling's funeral 3 states away, in the middle of winter in not great weather. I 10 hour each direction road tripped it alone with the boys when they were 1 and 3. Countless trips between here (where I grew up) and where Jet grew up (and mom is), 240 miles each direction. In some very unfriendly road conditions at times. All of the trips around here.
I always called my first car "The White Lady". I had every intention of calling this car "The Mother-mobile". Jet started calling it before we even had it a year, "The Mule". It was a better fit. We worked that car hard. It was reliable. Up until the bitter end (which was not its fault). I had altered the name years ago to "The Beloved Mule". I will miss it. But in a way, I'm glad it went while it was still on the top of its game. It had not become a problematic money pit we had to eventually just not repair. It can always remain my "Beloved Mule"
But still I wish it was in my driveway, waiting for the next trip.
Friday, May 11, 2012
Series of Unfortunate Events: Car Edition
This last month has been trying. To say the least. While nothing was major, in some ways, the cumulative effect got to me tonight. While making a deposit at the ATM.
It all started about 6 weeks ago. The starter went in my car. Not really a big deal at all. Jet replaced the very worn spark plugs and wires while he was at it.
About the same time, Jet took his very problematic classic hot rodded car in because he felt something was not right. The head gasket was on crooked. An expensive repair. Again. I had surprising peace about it. Once it got home, Jet did an investigation on the body as it was not making correct left hand turns. This turned into major time consuming problems. The exhaust system was not attached where it should be and tearing holes in the floor of the car. Causing problems with the frame. And then something with the subfloor. And the floor. Jet is doing this work himself, but it is time consuming. He has been working on it since. It is getting close (he thinks, but he says this many times and it is not the reality) to being done.
Pyrope had a speech screening (that took over an hour) because his speech is not normal for a child his age. I have said this for a long time, but he is not catching up. I have not received the official report, but from the comments the therapist made as we were leaving, I wouldn't be surprised if this time it actually showed a delay.
Then a little over a month, while my 19 year old brother was driving my mom's car (that they share), the engine went. Basically because of how poorly my mother has maintained the car since my father passed away.
Obsidian was playing "construction site" outside and found some small cinder blocks (they are about the size of 2 standard bricks combined), and dropped one on his toe. Because of his growth issues, this became a somewhat complicated journey to a pediatric orthopedic surgeon. He was not casted, but was out of taekwondo and all "contact type activities" for 4 weeks. I will be glad when 4 weeks is up on Monday.
Jet found my mother a new car. My mother and I got in a large fight, and she snapped. Fortunately my sister was able to calm her down.
While 19 year old brother was driving my car (somewhere he really should not have been), my car stopped driving. The alternator was going bad, he had stalled multiple times in a row, and drained the battery. (This all done after Jet and my boys were asleep). While Jet was replacing the alternator, the car slipped on the jacks and ruined the radiator (better the radiator than hurting Jet). While I was running to the store for parts, went down to my basement to find out the bottom of our hot water tank left go and we had a 75 gallon flood going on. And no hot water. Yes, while Jet is working on my car in the driveway. My car got fixed (eventually and late) that evening. We had a new tankless hot water system installed by late the next day (we had decided we were going tankless when our tank went, just not anticipating that day).
Someone from the public schools came to observe Pyrope in his class. Still haven't heard anything about that. I've called once. I will call again to keep that ball rolling. I started it rolling in January. Well, I've been trying to have it start rolling since January might be a better way to put it.
Then Jet was backing up his car, and he could not get it out of reverse. Fortunately, this happened right in front of our house so he was able to drive in reverse across our neighbor's yard to get it properly into our front yard. This same piece went on my sister's car in the fall, so he knew what was wrong. A $25 piece that is the size of a nickle. A day later, the part came in and his car was good.
Then the alternator went in my 22 year old brother's car. Jet replaced it that night. Without incident. He also replaced the spark plugs. Something is not quite right still and it should be checked out as Jet can not quite put his finger on what is wrong. We have enough of this car, that Jet can tell if something is amiss.
My sister called. She needs new suspension in her car. Jet might help with that. (You must keep in mind that all of these cars are the same make and model except for original car of my mother's, and that is just a different model).
My mom/19 year old brother's new to them car needed new spark plugs. So Jet went to replace them. I had picked them up from the part store (along with a PVC valve that was not quite right but Jet made work). When Jet went to put them in, the one spark plug was bad. The electrode was not centered as it should be, came out at an angle, and the end which should be straight and crisp edges was not. How it made it past quality control. Jet said he had never seen a spark plug bad like that from the store. When I went to return it, each of the employees asked how I knew it was bad. I replied with a simple "Look". Each replied with an "Oh.... oooh. I've never seen that before. That definitely is bad"
So last Saturday, I was driving home from biking with my 31 year old brother, SIL, nephew, and my mom. We were meeting at a restaurant afterwards. I was stopping at home to get Obsidian's shot. I was stopped at a red light. The girl (and I mean girl, she is 17) behind me did not stop. Everyone was fine. Pyrope and I had some mild whiplash, Obsidian was rear facing and had no physical complaints. Obsidian and I have had some nightmares (Obsidian's involve the glass that came flying at him, as my back glass was shattered, mine mainly revolve around the 3 teenaged pedestrians that were a couple steps away from being hit by me when my car was shoved forward). My car... totaled. Car seats, totaled. Booster seat I had from when another child was in my car earlier that day, totaled. My bike, totaled. Pyrope's bike, totaled. Seat for Obsidian on my bike, totaled. Bike rack, totaled.
I am very grateful that no one was hurt. If the circumstances had been just slightly different in any number of ways, it is very likely that would not have been the case.
However, a lot of things were 'totaled'. Most of which have to be replaced. The car seats and Pyrope's bike have been replaced (I had bought a bike the next size up on Black Friday, it was sitting in a box in our garage. It is big on Pyrope, but he can make it work. I knew I was just replacing the seats I had with the same ones, so I just ordered them.) My car is being difficult to replace. An American made, manual transmission car, for a family, is not so easy to find right now.
Then this week, 19 year old brother, driving the new to him/Mom car hit an outrigger that had fallen off of a construction truck (you know the things that stabilize machines when they are doing work, one of those). The brand new front tire. Toast. Part of the floor accordion up. Jet pounded out the rim and a new tire was purchased. Jet and brother are fixing the car. Currently the floor for part of the passenger side is made up of duct tape until a new floor can be welded in.
This too will pass. But I sure hope for some boring times for a while. I have this nagging, haunting fear right now that something else is going to happen. Something that will not be able to be fixed with time and money. For looking at the very long laundry list of things that have gone wrong, and how things could have been just slightly different and the outcome would not have been so good, no one has been hurt (well, bank accounts have been plenty hurt, but that can be replenished). It is my prayers that no one is hurt, but I keep having these very real, tangible reminders that it can happen. But as I deposited the 6 checks for the totaled items from the accident, that did not even happen a week ago. I cried. I cried from the loss and frustration and difficulty. I cried from the fear of something worse. I cried for those who have not been so lucky and it has been worse.
It all started about 6 weeks ago. The starter went in my car. Not really a big deal at all. Jet replaced the very worn spark plugs and wires while he was at it.
About the same time, Jet took his very problematic classic hot rodded car in because he felt something was not right. The head gasket was on crooked. An expensive repair. Again. I had surprising peace about it. Once it got home, Jet did an investigation on the body as it was not making correct left hand turns. This turned into major time consuming problems. The exhaust system was not attached where it should be and tearing holes in the floor of the car. Causing problems with the frame. And then something with the subfloor. And the floor. Jet is doing this work himself, but it is time consuming. He has been working on it since. It is getting close (he thinks, but he says this many times and it is not the reality) to being done.
Pyrope had a speech screening (that took over an hour) because his speech is not normal for a child his age. I have said this for a long time, but he is not catching up. I have not received the official report, but from the comments the therapist made as we were leaving, I wouldn't be surprised if this time it actually showed a delay.
Then a little over a month, while my 19 year old brother was driving my mom's car (that they share), the engine went. Basically because of how poorly my mother has maintained the car since my father passed away.
Obsidian was playing "construction site" outside and found some small cinder blocks (they are about the size of 2 standard bricks combined), and dropped one on his toe. Because of his growth issues, this became a somewhat complicated journey to a pediatric orthopedic surgeon. He was not casted, but was out of taekwondo and all "contact type activities" for 4 weeks. I will be glad when 4 weeks is up on Monday.
Jet found my mother a new car. My mother and I got in a large fight, and she snapped. Fortunately my sister was able to calm her down.
While 19 year old brother was driving my car (somewhere he really should not have been), my car stopped driving. The alternator was going bad, he had stalled multiple times in a row, and drained the battery. (This all done after Jet and my boys were asleep). While Jet was replacing the alternator, the car slipped on the jacks and ruined the radiator (better the radiator than hurting Jet). While I was running to the store for parts, went down to my basement to find out the bottom of our hot water tank left go and we had a 75 gallon flood going on. And no hot water. Yes, while Jet is working on my car in the driveway. My car got fixed (eventually and late) that evening. We had a new tankless hot water system installed by late the next day (we had decided we were going tankless when our tank went, just not anticipating that day).
Someone from the public schools came to observe Pyrope in his class. Still haven't heard anything about that. I've called once. I will call again to keep that ball rolling. I started it rolling in January. Well, I've been trying to have it start rolling since January might be a better way to put it.
Then Jet was backing up his car, and he could not get it out of reverse. Fortunately, this happened right in front of our house so he was able to drive in reverse across our neighbor's yard to get it properly into our front yard. This same piece went on my sister's car in the fall, so he knew what was wrong. A $25 piece that is the size of a nickle. A day later, the part came in and his car was good.
Then the alternator went in my 22 year old brother's car. Jet replaced it that night. Without incident. He also replaced the spark plugs. Something is not quite right still and it should be checked out as Jet can not quite put his finger on what is wrong. We have enough of this car, that Jet can tell if something is amiss.
My sister called. She needs new suspension in her car. Jet might help with that. (You must keep in mind that all of these cars are the same make and model except for original car of my mother's, and that is just a different model).
My mom/19 year old brother's new to them car needed new spark plugs. So Jet went to replace them. I had picked them up from the part store (along with a PVC valve that was not quite right but Jet made work). When Jet went to put them in, the one spark plug was bad. The electrode was not centered as it should be, came out at an angle, and the end which should be straight and crisp edges was not. How it made it past quality control. Jet said he had never seen a spark plug bad like that from the store. When I went to return it, each of the employees asked how I knew it was bad. I replied with a simple "Look". Each replied with an "Oh.... oooh. I've never seen that before. That definitely is bad"
So last Saturday, I was driving home from biking with my 31 year old brother, SIL, nephew, and my mom. We were meeting at a restaurant afterwards. I was stopping at home to get Obsidian's shot. I was stopped at a red light. The girl (and I mean girl, she is 17) behind me did not stop. Everyone was fine. Pyrope and I had some mild whiplash, Obsidian was rear facing and had no physical complaints. Obsidian and I have had some nightmares (Obsidian's involve the glass that came flying at him, as my back glass was shattered, mine mainly revolve around the 3 teenaged pedestrians that were a couple steps away from being hit by me when my car was shoved forward). My car... totaled. Car seats, totaled. Booster seat I had from when another child was in my car earlier that day, totaled. My bike, totaled. Pyrope's bike, totaled. Seat for Obsidian on my bike, totaled. Bike rack, totaled.
I am very grateful that no one was hurt. If the circumstances had been just slightly different in any number of ways, it is very likely that would not have been the case.
However, a lot of things were 'totaled'. Most of which have to be replaced. The car seats and Pyrope's bike have been replaced (I had bought a bike the next size up on Black Friday, it was sitting in a box in our garage. It is big on Pyrope, but he can make it work. I knew I was just replacing the seats I had with the same ones, so I just ordered them.) My car is being difficult to replace. An American made, manual transmission car, for a family, is not so easy to find right now.
Then this week, 19 year old brother, driving the new to him/Mom car hit an outrigger that had fallen off of a construction truck (you know the things that stabilize machines when they are doing work, one of those). The brand new front tire. Toast. Part of the floor accordion up. Jet pounded out the rim and a new tire was purchased. Jet and brother are fixing the car. Currently the floor for part of the passenger side is made up of duct tape until a new floor can be welded in.
This too will pass. But I sure hope for some boring times for a while. I have this nagging, haunting fear right now that something else is going to happen. Something that will not be able to be fixed with time and money. For looking at the very long laundry list of things that have gone wrong, and how things could have been just slightly different and the outcome would not have been so good, no one has been hurt (well, bank accounts have been plenty hurt, but that can be replenished). It is my prayers that no one is hurt, but I keep having these very real, tangible reminders that it can happen. But as I deposited the 6 checks for the totaled items from the accident, that did not even happen a week ago. I cried. I cried from the loss and frustration and difficulty. I cried from the fear of something worse. I cried for those who have not been so lucky and it has been worse.
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