This year, I've felt that there were changes in the air. For me. For my family. Problem being, I just don't know where those changes are going.
I got a new certification. I thought teaching that course was where I was starting to go. But getting it up off the ground is proving to be difficult. Very difficult, for a number of technical reasons. I'm still quietly working on it, but also willing to just let it go.
I went to school full time this past semester. It went well enough. It is much harder to be a SAHM, go to school full time (mainly on line), and work part time than it was to go to school full time and work part time. Way harder.
My hours at my part time job were cut from 20+ a week (if I wanted) to 8 a month. This cut was over 18 months, but the last drop was from 8 a week to 8 a month. This is what lead me back to school.
Jet's health insurance changed. The change was not good for us. It caused a cash flow problem. Well, causes one. It is why I'm not going to school this summer. Jet is looking for a different job for this reason. As long as both of us are functioning, we can make this insurance work. If one of us were out of commission, we would be screwed.
Pyrope has been diagnosed with autism. Not really a surprise, but it still stings to 'officially' get the diagnosis. There have continued to be battles with the school and him. Overall, he is doing much much much better academically. On a day to day, practically speaking way, I still have to be very on top of things to make sure what should be happening at school is. I'm really hoping for not one of the 2nd grade teachers. She is known for being mean to her students and starting fights with their parents. Pyrope does excellent with positive reinforcement, and pretty lousy with being yelled at. I start enough of my own fights with the school without being antagonized to do so. I'm hoping the principal feels the same and just gives Pyrope the 'nice' teacher.
And then there is Obsidian. My karma. The school issues with him have been large. Much more problematic than Pyrope's. This coming year will be all day kindergarten. In the meeting to talk about his transition, I was told the behavior problems I'm having at home are all my fault due to parenting techniques. Never mind the fact, the only time I have these severe behavior issues is when it is over 70 degrees and he has school that day. Also never mind the fact that his doctors say it is related to his medical issues. I have had a sense of it, and his pediatrician warned me, that this coming school year, I might have to keep him at home on either home based instruction or just pulled to homeschool due to his medical problems. Before that conversation with her, I had come to the conclusion I shouldn't go to school or commit to working in the fall for that reason, but I got confirmation. I was sad, so sad to realize that others were seeing the same potential problems I am.
So many days I don't know if I'm coming or going. I know that my day to day life is going to look so different soon. I just have no idea how it is going to look.
