The numbers are rising

For many types of cancer, doctors look at specific values in blood draws to gauge if the cancer is progressing, staying the same, or going into remission.  The blood draws and the hopes for "good" numbers each time is a nerve wracking process.

When my dad had his surgery for cancer, the markers they were looking for went to 0.  And stayed there 6 months.  Month 7 showed a slight rise.  A week later showed it wasn't a lab error.  6 weeks later, he passed away.  I know that most of the time the results aren't that quick and dramatic.  But I have lived through when they were for a family member.

When my MIL had her first surgery for cancer last spring, the marker that they were looking at for her did not particularly drop.  It was not that surprising.  She still had a type of cancer that had not yet been removed.  In July, what was initially told as a successful surgery to remove the other unrelated cancer turned on a dime as she was being released as the surgeon stated that the detailed pathology reports showed that she had another cancer, ovarian.  This was not picked up in the prior testing or even during the surgery.  Another surgery would be needed.  Not that surprisingly, the markers for cancer still did not go down.  They were continuing to slowly rise.  After the surgery in November, the numbers leveled off, but did not drop.  She put off starting chemo until late January.  The markers had started to rise again by that point.  With the initiation of chemo, the numbers started to hold steady.  Before round 4, they came down a little.  Then, before her most recent round (#5), they were showing to rise.  Not even hold steady, but rise.  Despite the chemo that was supposed to be eradicating the cancer.

My MIL did not ask if this event is going to cause the doctor to revise the course of action.  Or her prognosis as a whole.  Both Jet and I have a feeling it makes her prognosis worse, but don't want to completely verbalize it as when Jet has questioned her she has not asked her doctors about this and does not intent on it.

It is hard watching a parent (or anyone close) to go through cancer.  To me, it is even more maddening to have someone is so unclear about what her prognosis is, what test results mean, and what are the options.  Not to mention a realistic view or ideas or plans for the future.  Jet takes this aspect of it better than I do.  I want to know what the honest prognosis is, not some half details that only give a partial image of what is known by her doctors.  If she was choosing to not share what she knows with us, it would be easier for me.  But she doesn't know.  And is unwilling to ask to learn more (if the doctors want her to know something, they will tell her is her philosophy)

But these are her choices.  Jet will talk to her on the phone.  He will go up to help and visit when he is wanted.  When she wants or feels up to seeing the kids, all of us will do a road trip up.  We will pray.  We will help as she accepts or wants it.  And we pray.